Why Marriage Counselling

Marriage Counselling and Therapy is very effective in helping individuals and couples to heal.

Why Marriage Counselling?….

Studies show the following:

  • It takes less time than individual support. Working on something together is more effective. Our relationships really influence us. Over 98% of those surveyed reported that they received good or excellent couples therapy, and over 97% of those polled said they got the help they needed. After working with a marriage or family therapist, 93% of clients said they had more effective tools for dealing with their problems. Respondents also reported improved physical health and the ability to function better at work after attending therapy.
  • Marriage Counseling is cheaper because you are helping two people rather than one.
  • You will receive tools that you can work with. this really makes the time worthwhile.
  • People often think therapy is only for couples whose relationships are so bad that it is their last resort. The studies say this is not true. We need to take the time to heal!
  • The better you understand yourself and your own role in your relationship, the easier it will be to solve issues that arise. working on something with someone helps the person to keep their commitment to change.
  • Therapy is a good way to be proactive about the future and problems that could develop. It is so much better to proactive rather than reactive

10 Relationship Counselling Tips…

Make your spouse, the first priority in your life. Love, faithfulness, and commitment are necessary for feeling good about a relationship. Couples who treat each other as the number one priority usually make their partner feel the same way. Why Marriage Counselling? Relationship counseling works!

  1. Do something extra nice for a holiday and other special moments help create caring. When we first start dating we are good at this. Wooing is a lost art after couples have been together for a while. Take time to surprise each other with small gifts or noticing even small things that help nurture love. Gratitude goes a long way in relationship counseling.
  2. Say something good about each other daily. Everyone needs to feel worthwhile and praised. Much more behavior is changed from praise than criticism. It is said “Beware of those who speak negatively about everything and everybody. For a negative person will never say a positive thing about you.”
  3. Choose one of your mate’s weak or less commendable traits and rarely if ever bring it up during a discussion. We can spend too much time dwelling on the unhelpful characteristics of our partner, hoping they will change. Most spouses know the kind of things we dislike and if they desire to change they will. Continuous reminding does little if anything to change behavior.
  4. Choose a chore often done by your other half that they might not enjoy doing and do it for them. When someone does a task without being asked to, it is valued even more. This is especially true if the task is one of your companion does not find really enjoyable.
  5. Find time away from the home with your partner without the children. A change of surroundings can do wonders for a couple. Setting fun goals together can really help. Plan a trip even if it is just a small one. You take a trip without even leaving home.
  6. Tell others how much you love and value your partner. Often those small gestures will come back to your partner. We all appreciate hearing good wishes about ourselves.
  7. Write your partner a love letter and send it registered mail. It is exhilarating to get mail significant enough that it requires a signature.
  8. To buy our book on marriage and a content life click here. Read it out loud together spending time discussing new ideas you get from reading the book.
  9. Many religious groups offer short courses, seminars focusing on enriching marital relationships. The local clergy should be able to refer couples to such classes. Many community schools or the Cooperative Extension Service offer courses in improving marital relationships. Consider attending one as a couple.

What is really great about the fact you found this page is that you are making a commitment to look for ways to improve things. You may be young, middle-aged, or a senior. This may be your first marriage or your second or third. You may have children, or you may be gaining a stepchild. What is important is that you are exploring and learning how to make it better!

Why Marriage Counselling?

We all need to improve who we are as a couple and as individuals.

If you are not married here are some things to help you get ready for the plunge before you dive in.

  • Understand that your spouse-to-be will not change. People often share that they were aware of their partner’s flaws before getting married. About 95 percent of the time, they believe the behavior will change. It’s important to realize that your spouse will not change, and, in fact, character imperfections will likely worsen—or become more apparent—over time. Determine if you can live with your partner’s personality quirks forever—before you tie the knot.
  • Choose a partner who shares your financial views. Money is the most common cause of divorce. Couples often have wildly differing philosophies about how to handle finances and, once married, it can be difficult to harmonize separate value systems. If you choose someone who shares your views the two shall become one! You really need to be on the same page with this.
  • After the wedding: Recognize that marriage is hard work. Begin your marriage with the idea that you will work together every day on the marriage. Being married is a work in progress. Be proactive,  not reactive. Problems when they arise instead of waiting for tension to escalate into an argument that explodes between you. Don’t forget the little things that attracted you to your spouse in the beginning, especially when you’re managing a time of conflict. You may see each other every day, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take the time to appreciate one another.
  • Go to a marriage counselor regularly. Don’t wait for a fight to break out before seeking help from a relationship. Be proactive, not reactive. You go to a trainer at a gym. why not use your employee health benefits to make sure your relationship is healthy.
  • Decide to grow together. Many people marry before exploring their views on important issues. Before marriage, take classes on spending, child-rearing, religion or any other sensitive topics. Get educated together. When you’re on the same page, the two of you can decide how to handle complex issues before they come up.
  • See that you both have the same day off, once a week. To be strong as a unit you need to take time together. Relax one morning a week. Cuddle and talk in bed.  Catch up on the week, vent about work or share a funny story. Lock the door. Connect. No kids allowed.
  • Share a hobby. Find a common interest that will bring you together. Take dance lessons. Go fly a kite, listen to a playlist you both like on Spotify.

Why Marriage Counselling? It works!

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